two decades old!

ladies and gents..

I’m turning 20 in 2 days.

I can't believe I’m ditching the 1. 

what in the world. 

Have I really lived  2 decades?

So many memories wrapped up into 2 words: two decades.

I can't even begin to remember everything, what will I remember when I'm 60? 

Nineteen has to be the most awkward age. I don’t mean in terms of physical appearance or puberty.  I'm talking about answering the question: “how old are you?”  It’s just kind of embarrassing to have to say, “I’m nineteen.”  People don’t know what to do with you. You’re still a teenager, which means you absolutely can’t be taken seriously.  However, you have been an adult since you turned 18.  It's frustrating. Most people would say that nothing really changes when you turn 20, because everyone is looking forward to just being 21, but not this lady. I’m rather excited to be turning 20, because I don’t plan on drinking anyways I could careless, turning 20 means a new chapter of my life.

turning twenty, with concerns beyond number.

I'm literally 2 days away from turning 20, and I still don't know how to change a tire or start the grill. I can barely cook or sew. I understand very little about (government and politics.) I don't know CPR.  And  I can't imagine giving birth in less than 5 years.

what I am trying to grasp hold of as I turn 20:

• Stay out of debt, Live within your means, Start saving NOW.
• Don't burn down bridges (grudges achieve very little)
• YOU HAVE TIME TO FIND A JOB YOU LOVE; it takes about 10 years after graduation or college to find the right fit, and anyone who finds it earlier than that is just plain lucky. So use every bit of your 10 years: try things, take classes, start over. 
• DON’T RUSH DATING AND MARRIAGE; 
  Some people view marriage as the next step to happiness or grown-up life or some kind of legitimacy, and in their mad desire to be married, they overlook significant issues in the relationship.
• Seek out a MENTOR and get counsel; Counseling—time with a mentor, personal scriptural study, a small group experience and outside reading—can help you grow, and can help you connect more deeply with God.
• DON’T GET STUCK; don't stay in jobs you hate, because you're too scared to get another one. Don't get into relationships because you fear being lonely. ask yourself questions “Am I proud of the life I’m living? What have I tried this month? What have I learned about God this year? What parts of my childhood faith am I leaving behind, and what parts am I choosing to keep? Do the people I’m spending time with give me life, or make me feel small? Is there any brokenness in my life that’s keeping me from moving forward?”

try to 

EMBRACE IT.

NO other gods!

I just started the new book we're reading for life groups these next 8 weeks. It is going to be amazing, the very first lesson was so insightful. I can't wait to drive into it. Two things I really took away from the 1st day had to do with idols... no shocker there i'll assume if you paid any attention to the tile of this entry. 

first, I knew what an idol was but I hadn't thought about it to the extent of how much you'd give up for another human being and how if you are willing to do anything for them that it could be sinful you could be making that person an idol of your heart. 

second, I realized I'm usually in denial about this issue. I rub it off my shoulder and say I don't struggle with having "other gods before" the One true God.

Friends of mine have said that they have been struggling with arriving to a point were you've achieved a goal and you've passed certain steps to get to this place were you don't struggle with sinning anymore or at least you don't struggle as much. And I would say I struggle with feeling this way as well, but the truth of the matter is we really never will arrive and attain that perfection. We are supposed to strive to be like Christ but when we make being perfect an idol of our heart our motives have changed and it doesn't matter if we do the right thing because the desire of our heart was just to do a perfect job at it or to prove we know what is right to do. 

I have a good feeling about this study and I can't wait to blog all about it. I can't wait to see what the Lord is going to teach me through it. 

until next time. 

when your phone is messed up..

you feel like:

• your world is falling apart
• you'll never get over this
• like your best friend died 
• you can't cope
• the tear will never stop

its so funny how i get, I'm sure most of you could relate. part of me really wishes i wasn't like this. 

our cell phone are communication with the people in our lives. its like telling someone, you can't talk to them anymore. our phones help us lead our lives to the extent that we do. i would miss technology a lot. :) 

what spurred on was an iCloud mishap. Kaylee thought she was just deleting the contacts off her phone but because we have the same iTunes account it did the same on my phone. so as i was trying to fix it, the computer made my phone hers and i lost everything and it was replaced by her stuff. thankfully i fixed that but the contacts were still deleted. any who i just laughed at myself because of how upset i got about it.

april showers bring may flowers

it's been a good while since i posted. 

christmas came and went.

not a single, solitary speck of snow all winter.

february and march came.

and here we are in april.

life is pretty sweet these days. i can't complain about much. i'm just in a good place! 

so much can be said its been such a busy month so far.

we have had lots of rain. and last week we had tornados in the area. 

not a lot of damage thankfully. but it was scary to see some so close to home.

although easter sunday was a blessing, i was saddened by the weather. it was cold and rainy. unlike last year our easter group pictures were not quite as fab. we stood under the awning with only grass for a colorful background unfortunately the flowers in the field did not bloom this year. i'm only slightly bitter about this. the day was a lot of fun in spite of the rain. 

we drove out to east texas a few weeks ago & i couldn't help enjoy the scenery. i love the texas bluebonnets and the way the air smells out there. i was just in awe and totally aware of GOD'S hand in it all. it was really cool. the drive out there are probably one of my most favorite things. its just you, the land and GOD out there its beautiful. 

pumpkin pumpkin pumpkin

I'm SO ready for the fall... why? because of all the pumpkin baked goods. I have an obsession with pumpkin!
Coffee creamer
Breads (Panera and Starbucks have awesome pumpkin breads)
Desserts
Candles
Lotions!!!
If it's got pumpkin in it, it's pretty likely I'll love it!!!!
I can't wait to wear rustic reds, browns for fall colors!! It just isn't coming quick enough for me!

finally got a picture up!

So I realized I may not be able to keep using my iphone app to blog. Sadly. So I will just have to make time to get on the computer and blog for a bit. It's nap time at work and therefore I'm online, must run though mommies and daddies will be coming to pick up their little ones. So glad I figured this out though.

So Im venturing out into a blog world...

I'm not sure that I'll keep up with this but I think it should be fun for a while. What's a person supposed to fill such a thing with? guess we'll see..